Why Being Disliked Can Mean You’re Doing the Right Thing as a Parent

Our neighbor has overstepped our boundaries more than once. He’s an older gentleman whose son used to own our home. At first, we gave him the benefit of the doubt…. perhaps he just needed time to adjust. But four years later, he made a change to our property—without asking, consulting, or even mentioning it.

This time, I didn’t let it slide.

I was clear and calm but firm: the change needed to be reversed within 48 hours.

His reaction? Far from warm. For months, he turned his back when we passed in the driveway, ignoring our greetings and pretending we didn’t exist.

It didn’t feel good to be disliked. It rarely does.

But you know what else doesn’t feel good? Being walked over again and again.

Four months later, he stopped me during a dog walk and said, “Hello, how are you?”

He added, “Please wait—I want to give you some lemons from my tree.”

It was a full-circle moment. I didn’t hold onto bitterness. I know he’s doing the best he can with what he knows. But I also know that my peace, my space, and my sanity matter too.

This is the practice: doing what’s hard.

Not because you want conflict—but because avoiding it means abandoning yourself.

Boundaries Aren’t Just for Neighbors
This scenario shows up constantly in parenting. There are countless times we say “no” not because it’s easy, but because it’s necessary:
• No, I’m not doing any more cleaning today.
• No, I’m tired too.
• No, you can’t go to the shops at 10pm at 14 years old.
• Yes, you can stay home by yourself—but I know you’re too unwell to be alone, and it’s not okay to leave you.

Holding a boundary—especially when it’s inconvenient or uncomfortable—is part of being a conscious parent. It’s a form of protection. It safeguards our kids, and often, our own well-being.

Choosing Authenticity Over Approval
A friend once asked my sons, “Is your mum cool?”
Their response: “Hell no.”
And I was proud of that.
Because I don’t want to be the cool mum.

I want to be the mum who does what’s hard, what’s uncomfortable…. if it means protecting them, guiding them, or helping them grow into peaceful, grounded humans.

There was a time when I would’ve stayed quiet to keep the peace. But in doing that, I would’ve buried my needs. As Dr. Gabor Maté teaches, chronic self-suppression is a pathway to dis-ease—physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

We aren’t here to be liked by everyone.

We’re here to live authentically—even if that means being disliked.

The Long-Term Tradeoff
What situations do you avoid simply because they’re easier in the short term?
What’s the long-term cost...for you, and your child?

DIna, it takes courage to stand in your truth. To uphold boundaries. To say no even when it’s awkward…. and yes when it’s inconvenient. But this is what conscious parenting is.

Not always comfortable.

Always worth it.

P.S Are you struggling with setting boundaries that protect your peace? Let’s explore this together. Learn more about the Stressed to Best Parent Method here. Or book a call to chat through whether it’s a good fit for your family.